Who among you fears the Lord
and obeys his servant?
If you are walking in darkness,
without a ray of light,
trust in the Lord
and rely on your God.11
But watch out, you who live in your own light
and warm yourselves by your own fires.
Isaiah 50:10-11 NLT
A few quick errands became hours spent away from home punctuated by feedings, diaper changes and spit up. I was just pulling into the garage on a scorching Texas day when I realized my newborn was blissfully asleep in the back seat. Wanting her to sleep as long as possible, I kept the garage door up and the engine running while I shuttled my purchases inside.
I saved the best bundle for last. My plan was to stealthily dislodge her car seat from the base and place the whole thing inside the crib. If I made sloth-like movements, she just might finish out her nap and give me a few minutes to locate the sanity I'd lost somewhere between the dry cleaners and Costco.
I gently slid up her door handle. It didn't move.
I opened the door with a bit more persistence. It didn't move.
I gave it an all out yank. It didn't move.
Alarm raced up my spine as I realized my baby was locked inside my car.
My gut dialed 9-1-1. I wasn't sure if they'd bring handcuffs with them or just a copy of the Bad Mom Award but the fire department arrived in mere moments. A quick survey of my situation brought out the slim jim and some judgmental glances.
"Um, Mam, do you perchance have Onstar?"
I mumbled a tentative, "Yes."
"Did you call them already?"
Judgement evaporated by the cloud cover of humored, yet straight faces.
The fire fighters showed me the number for OnStar posted, for my convenience, on the outside of my window and suggested I try them first. Seconds later my doors clicked, their engine roared and my baby slept through it all.
Sometimes I try to find my own way out of a situation. I plot a conversation or ponder a problem. I walk by the light of my own fire. OnStar should have been my first call, not my last. God shouldn't be my last call either.
When you light a candle, there's a moment between the spark and when the object actually takes the fire. I need to invite Him into my struggle at the first spark. In the pause between the spark and the blaze is the opportunity to overcome my circumstances instead of allowing them to overcome me.
Do you ever walk by the light of your own fire? How could God's light change your situation?
I was privileged this week to guest post at Patheos for my friend, Bill Blankshaen. Do you ever wonder what your pastor's wife would say if you overheard her true confession? Well I am a pastor's wife and this is mine... http://bit.ly/Z4sDgc