From My Mind to His Hands

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

1 Peter 5:7

The years I spent in Chattanooga prior to my divorce were motivated by one thing and one thing only. I didn’t want to put my baby in daycare. We moved there so my then mother-in-law could watch my baby.

She was a sweet, unassuming and quiet woman. Each day when I picked up my precious baby she would report the day’s activities. Nestled among bottles and bedtime were firsts. Firsts I didn’t see. My guilt was enormous.

Lately I’ve been experiencing a different kind of firsts – a first date, my first daughter to get her license. But nothing could top what my oldest brought home just two weeks ago. A brochure from school which contained an order form for a class ring.

We had just been looking at her baby pictures. My third, Clara who’s almost 7, interrupted us, took one look at the photos and asked, “Mom how come you never told me you used to be young?”

Serious. Ego. Blow. My “baby” was about to order a symbol of her independence to wear on her hand. My face tells the story of sixteen years of midnight worries and sleep that never was as sound again. 

Many years ago I ordered a ring emblazoned with school's name. For a few years it circled my finger but soon it slipped from my hand to make a permanent home as a charm. 

I wonder what would happen if I faced my worries the same way. If I saw them for what they really were. They circle my brain for a while but eventually they make a permanent home in His hands. They are a symbol of my dependence. They remind me how much I desperately need Him.

Can you name your worry today? Do you dare to slip it from your mind into His capable hands?

Why Worry Isn't Always Wrong

Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

Matthew 6:27

"I worry about our kids more than I used to." I made this confession to my husband yesterday. I felt like a spiritual failure. Isn't worry in opposition to faith? Shouldn't my faith ever increase?

As God deposited His goodness into my life, my faith increased:

He delivered us from a lengthy legal battle.
He eradicated cancer from my husband's body.
He navigated Scott's career into the ministry.

Am I a spiritual "wimp" because I worry? Not if I worry enough to pray but not enough to paralyze.

When my worry leads me to the feet of Jesus, it centers me.
When my concern causes me to cast my cares on Him, it frees me.
When my anxiety aims me closer to His heart, it fills me with a better thing.

I may worry more about my kids, than I once did but I allow my worry to take me to the One who conquers my cares. Maybe my worry isn't always wrong after all.

The Great Wall

Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand.

Psalm 73:23

Pregnancy comes with a multitude of surprises. You ache in places you didn't know existed. You have fluctuations in energy and appetite. A miracle grows within.

I was five months pregnant when I boarded the plane for Beijing. I knew a thrilling adventure awaited me. I was determined to capture each sight, smell and sound.

The day we traveled to the Great Wall was steamy for September. It's sheer enormity daunted. To climb it in my condition would be no small feat but I was determined. In parts it was a gentle slope. In others it was a vertical staircase. By the end I questioned my choice dozens of times. Just about the time I was certain I'd make Chinese headlines from being helicoptered back down, we made it to the top.

Shannon, Five Months Pregnant, at the top
of the Great Wall

Seasons of life bring Great Walls into our lives.

The child we're not sure how to parent.


The marriage stretched beyond its boundaries.


Finances so far into the red they're crimson.


Unplanned illnesses, changes, and circumstances.

Carynne (5) is quick to tell you she's been to China and climbed the Great Wall. With every stride of my legs, she kicked hers. She was with me in each uncertain step. Together we made it to the top.

When life's problems loom, I am not alone. 


When life is too much for me, it's not too much for Him.

He is with me in each uncertain step. Together we will make it to the top.

Caught Up or Pulled Down

We who are still alive will be caught up to meet the Lord in the air.

1 Thessalonians 4:17

"Do you ever put that baby down?" I was 24 hours postpartum with baby number four. Every time my nurse entered my room she found Carynne nestled in my arms instead of sleeping in her bed. The same could have been asked about any of my four babies. I treasured each stay in the hospital.

Midnight whispers during first meals.


Light bouncing from new skin.


Tender moments etched in my heart forever.

I was completely in those moments. No part of my heart was counting laundry to be washed or errands to be run. I was caught up in my baby.

Recently I dreamed of the rapture - the day when Jesus returns for His bride, the church. We will be caught up to meet Him in the air. In my dream, I and many around me weren't looking at Jesus. What bride walks the aisle without her gaze lingering on her intended? Not only was I not looking at Jesus, I was looking the opposite direction. What it was on earth that captivated my sight I do not know. It might be people, possessions or positions but something I was leaving stole my heart away from Jesus.

When I awoke, I reflected on my walk with God. Am I caught up with Him or pulled down by cares of this temporary life?

Like a novel too intriguing too put down, I want to be caught up in Him.

Like those newborn moments where my heart was fully engaged, I want to be caught up in Him.

When I am caught up in Him, my worries and cares no longer pull me down.