Believe it (or Not)

Mark 9:24 I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!

I blinked. That is precisely how long it took for Clara (5) to go from infant to Kindergartner.  Armed with a Vera Bradley lunchbox and 96 crayons individually labeled with her name, she was ready to take on elementary school. 

On milestone days, a mom faces them with a strange concoction of pride and fear, excitement and dread.  As my emotions flitted around the dial, I prayed.  I hoped.  I dreamed. 

I prayed for a daughter who acclimated easily.  I hoped for a teacher who would "get" Clara.  I dreamed of a future which would come sooner than I think.

We burst through the back doors of Clara's school to find her classroom.  As the door inched closer, I wondered what entry Clara would make.  Her feet never slowed.  Her confidence never waned.  She entered the classroom as if she were made for that moment.

Today's passage is Psalm 38.  In this chapter David lays his deepest longings before God.  His heart pounds with anticipation.  Will God deliver?  How will God bring him through? 

I wish I faced new challenges with Clara's confidence and courage.  Too often I want to shrink back and not press forward.  I blame my lackluster attitude on undeveloped skills or unattained knowledge.  In reality, what I lack is belief.

David ends his psalm with a plea for God to come quickly.  David didn't question if God was coming just when.  He walked with confidence and courage.

Jesus, very likely You will ask something of me today I feel too small to handle.  Truth is I am too small to handle it.  But...You are so big.  I don't have to wonder if You'll come.  I can stride confidently into whatever new challenge You give knowing Your entry is a when not an if.  Believe it or not...