The Greatest of These is Love

1 Corinthians 13:13b The greatest of these is love.

When I was four, my family moved to Munich, Germany. There my mother enrolled me in an all-German speaking preschool. This was quite a bold move on her part. Her assumption that I would fare well in my new surroundings was not completely unfounded because we had all taken at least six months of lessons in German to prepare us for this transition. What she had no way of knowing is that I had found my instruction to be utterly useless. To my four year old mind, it was complete nonsense that I had to learn all new terms for items that I already knew perfectly good words for.

Once at my new school, I became the entertainment of choice for my classroom. I would tell long stories giving great detail to the delight of my classmates. They would laugh at my antics and creativity. If you recall my early desire to be a stand-up comedian, you can imagine this warmed my heart. Six months into my comedy routine, it suddenly occurred to me that the source of their laughter was my English. They had not understood one word that I'd spoken. Perhaps there was a good reason to learn this crazy new vocabulary after all.

This morning I am reading Galatians 5. This chapter contains a list made famous as the "Fruit of the Spirit". These qualities - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control - are all evidence of God's work in the life of a Christian (Verses 22-23). What may be a bit of a surprise is that earlier in this chapter, Paul makes it clear that if the fruit of love isn't in my bowl, the rest of my fruit won't be too tasty. Paul states it this way, "The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love." (Verse 6)

Just as my preschool friends couldn't understand me because I wasn't speaking their language, my love if not spoken in a voice that can be understood won't have any affect. My antics may be entertaining but they will not be life-changing. Gary Chapman in his book, The Five Love Languages, does an excellent job of outlining ways that different people feel loved. Some respond to encouraging words. Others crave the kindness of an act of service. Some just desire to be touched lovingly and still others want to spend time with you. Finally, there are those who feel loved through receiving gifts.

Many people, including myself, try to make themselves aware of identifying their family and friends "love language". Even when I do that though, I find my love can still be rebuffed or muted by something else. Paul hides three little nuggets in this chapter that just might unstop the clog in my love flow:

• Silenced by Sin (Verses 19-21) - My husband's love language is without a doubt quality time. He enjoys just hanging out with me whether we're running, watching television or dining. There are days that I do all that and he still doesn't feel loved. In these verses, Paul lists fifteen ungodly behaviors. I find witchcraft saddled right up against envy. When I injure my husband with harsh words, a lack of respect or thoughtless behavior, my love flow to him gets stopped with my sin until I humble myself and ask for his forgiveness.
• Concealed by Conceit (Verse 26) - I remember early after I began walking with God, I had such a strong desire to give away the gift of abundant life that I had been given that I actively sought out someone to pour my life into. While my desire was not wrong, my execution was a bit flawed. I thought that I could really help her. My heart was pure but all she could see was the pride and self-righteousness that wrapped around my heart. Conceit shrouded my love such that she couldn't see beyond it to receive my love. My love flow to her was plugged up with pride.
• Layered Under Legalism (Verses 1, 4) - Too often love becomes a legal document with print too fine for even the sharpest of eye to read. The terms and conditions surrounding the giving of my love, may make it impossible for someone else to receive it. There is an individual who regularly interacts with members of my family in just this way. This person defines lengthy requirements that must be met, in order for his/her love to be doled out. This in fact is not a congested love flow but is a no flow. Love can not have stipulations attached to it. When this happens, it ceases to be love at all.

Jesus, help me talk love in a way that it can be heard by others. Help me cast off the notion that love is earned. Unblock my love flow through humility and my being quick to apologize. Today I offer my little world a fruit bowl accentuated with the captivating fragrance of Your love.